Don’t Cut in Front of My Driverless Car

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2015-07-23 – Okay, don’t even think of cutting in front of me. Doesn’t matter if you won’t hold me up. Doesn’t matter that you’re trying to get to the turn lane and no one else is letting you in. I won’t either. That space in front of me is sacred. I pray to it three times a day. It is my religion.


Actually, I don’t drive much. I work at home, so I don’t commute. When I go out with my wife, she usually drives. When I go out with my boys, they usually drive. I mostly do errands, but I’ve been trying to do some of those errands by bicycle. So I don’t drive much.

That’s why I can’t wait until Google or Apple or Tesla (or Honda or Ford) come out with a driverless car. I wouldn’t mind dispensing with the chore altogether.

I wasn’t always this way. I went to take my driver’s test at the first possible moment I was so anxious to drive. (I flunked and had to wait a month for a retake.) And I loved driving with my friends. But sometime after I drove my first quarter of a million miles, I got tired of it. I like to have a nice little car, but I don’t like driving it. Getting a driverless car would solve the problem.

For me.

But you know the type: the aggressive driver who’s rude, who cuts in, who won’t return the favor. He’s the guy who passes you, then loses ground, then passes you again, then loses ground again, never really getting ahead. I’m thinking that this type of driver might be unhappy with a driverless car. It is appearing that driverless cars will be safer than what we now have.

But will it be as vigilant in protecting that sacred space from intruders?

Because we know that driving is a competitive activity. It has nothing to do with getting from one place to another. At least for the aggressive driver. If Google wants to market a driverless car, they are going to have to take this mindset into account. Maybe a videogame. Virtual aggression instead of the real thing.

The next thing Google needs to work on is driverless terrorism.

One response to “Don’t Cut in Front of My Driverless Car

  1. Pingback: Computer-Operated Autonomous Automatic Weapons | Eightoh9·

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