2013-06-21 – My wife must have an app to detect when I am in the bathroom. That’s when she calls me. And it’s not just any bathroom. She calls me when I am in the bathroom at work. It’s not any particular bathroom. I’m in the La Crosse office today and she did it here. Chicago office bathrooms, La Crosse office bathrooms, it all works.

The truth is that this ability is newfound. She’s only been making bathroom calls for the last month to six weeks, a period that coincides exactly with the time since I bought my first smart phone. I assume that my wife’s app must work off the GPS in my phone. My old cell, a tiny flip phone, didn’t have GPS.

Now, I am assuming that the app ONLY detects when I am in a bathroom. I am assuming that my wife is not tracking me wherever I go. That’s the job of the NSA. My wife is not like that. Calling me when I am in the bathroom does fit her style, but round-the-clock surveillance does not. We trust each other. But we have a friendly competition over who has the better sense of humor.

My cell phone humor is attempting to call her when I know that she never answers her cell. But this now gives me an idea: when I need to reach my wife, all I need to do is go to the bathroom!